Holding On
by xx shadowdreamer
Summary: He felt an arm wrap around his shoulder, pulling him closer, but he wouldn’t let her do that again. He wouldn’t let her pull him so close again, just so she could rip his heart out and let go. TxG.


_Title:_** Holding On**  
_Author:_** xx shadowdreamer.**  
_Summary:_ **He felt an arm wrap around his shoulder, pulling him closer, but he wouldn't let her do that again. He wouldn't let her pull him so close again, just so she could rip his heart out and let go.**  
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__A/N:_ **Erm, hay. Sup guys? I know I haven't been writing, but something about summer made me feel a little bit creative. I hope you like this short little piece that kinda popped into my head.**

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Looking out at the ocean, there was only one thing that Troy Bolton wanted to do

He wanted to walk inside and feel the ocean's waves crash against his body and then begin pulling him farther away from the shore, farther away from the pain that once had been his savior when he felt his world had come crashing. His heart throbbed as he recalled all the memories that had taken place on that very shore, the very place he was standing.

Gabriella Montez.

That was a name that he once thought to be the most amazing name in the world. The one who could save him from all the pain he had suffered before; the one that made him forget his past and made him focus on the future that seemed so bright when she was around. She was the only person who knew who he truly was, even when he didn't know who he was himself, when he didn't know who Troy Bolton was. It was her who told him it didn't matter who Troy Bolton _was, _the only thing that mattered was who he was _going _to be.

He took a large breath, the scent of the salty ocean overwhelming him. He remembered standing here once upon a time, but the emotion inside him was quite different. He stood here one day with Gabriella, a smile on his face as their fingers laced together. He never knew that a gesture so simple could mean so much to him, not until she came. That was the day when he thought he had become the happiest man on Earth. He asked her to be his girlfriend and she said yes, saying there was nothing she wanted more than to be the only woman that he would call 'babe' or to be the only one to wake him up with a kiss in the morning. _Nothing. _

And there he stood, wondering if she still thought the same. If she still wanted to be the one to wake him up in the morning with a kiss, if she still wanted him to call her 'babe'. He didn't know, he decided. He would never know because he thought that after today, he would be gone. He would be nothing more than a memory. He decided that the waves would decide where he would end up or that he would just be a washed up body on the shore of the California coast. Either way, his fate would be the same.

He chuckled softly.

He remembered the time when he said he was going to die. He was a drug addict and the day before he found himself lying down inside the hospital, he remembered to savor the moment of being alive. He knew he was dying. It was funny though. A week after meeting Gabriella Montez at his best friend's birthday party, he realized he never even knew the feeling of being alive until she came and since then, Troy never wanted to see another drug.

He felt the water crash against his ankles. Troy Bolton closed his eyes and sighed heavily, as memories flooded his brain. Opening his eyes, he had realized it had been a few minutes had passed by and the sun was already halfway from being completely covered. Would this be the last time he saw the sunset? He took a large step further into the ocean as the wind blew his hair back. Maybe it would.

"Don't go…" a soft voice whispered through the air. He took another step. "Please."

And just like that, Troy Bolton fell to his knees and began sobbing, letting all his emotions out. He felt an arm wrap around his shoulder, pulling him closer, but he wouldn't let her do that again. He wouldn't let her pull him so close again, just so she could rip his heart out and let go.

"Don't." he pleaded, tears still falling from his eyes. "Don't touch me."

She winced, feeling as if his words hit her like daggers. _Don't touch me. _Gabriella closed her eyes and pulled her arm away from him as he got up slowly to look back at the ocean. The sun was almost gone.

"You know," he stated softly. "I always loved sitting here to watch the sun go down, especially when I was with you."

Her heart throbbed. She'd never seen him so pained and to think, he once thought that she was the only person who would never hurt him. The one person who would stick with him through whatever he was going through, but who knew that the person you loved the most would also be the one to cause the most pain?

"I-I met with Jay today." She told him softly. She watched him close his eyes softly, his face still and stiff. "He told me he wanted to get back together…"

"Gabriella," he interrupted. "I'm glad your life is working out for you, but I'd like to be alone."

He sighed, looking at her with watery eyes. He knew who Jay was. Jay was her ex-boyfriend and the person he knew she had once loved. He was the reason why Troy wasn't able to help her stop crying the first week he spent with her, the reason why he wasn't able to hold her and make her stop by whispering sweet nothings into her ear: because he wasn't Jay.

He saw them earlier, sitting at a table in the restaurant. He held her hand and she was smiling. It hurt him. It hurt so much that he had to get away because if he was losing her, he might as well not live. It was odd at the time, the feeling of great pain. He had never realized that a broken heart hurt so much.

Gabriella watched Troy as he stood still, looking out into the ocean once more. She knew what he was going to do and it pained her to think she was the one who made Troy Bolton feel that way. She closed her eyes, recalling what had happened earlier that day.

When Jay had asked her to be his girlfriend again, she wanted to say yes. She wanted to feel his lips against hers and she wanted to remember how much she loved him. It wasn't until after he kissed her when she realized that it wasn't Jay that she wanted to kiss or the one she wanted to love. It was Troy Bolton. She broke the kiss and told Jay the truth: that she was in love with the best guy she had ever met. Jay reached out to grab her hand and had told her: He's a lucky man. And when she got up, in the corner of her eye, she saw Troy Bolton through the glass window, staring directly at her, his face pale and emotionless. She ran outside to tell him what he saw was nothing but he had disappeared.

And for the next two hours, she was crying in the middle of the street and she didn't care who saw.

"I-I said no."

He looked at her, furious that she would lie to his face like that. "You said no?"

He watched as she nodded and then looked down. She wanted him to hold her and tell her it was okay, that he loved her, but instead she heard a loud, obnoxious chuckle. "Ha! I believe I saw you kissing him and the last time I checked, kissing doesn't tell a person that she doesn't like him."

He didn't believe her? She looked up at his eyes and noticed how different they looked. They didn't sparkle like they used to and she couldn't look at him. Not when he was so angry at her.

"You don't know…" he began, tears welling up in his eyes again. "You don't know how much it hurt. It's been three years since you broke up with him and I finally thought you were over him and that maybe, I would be the first thought in your head when you wake up and the last one right before you sleep. Just like how you are to me."

"Troy!" she called out as the tears were finally escaping from her eyes. "You don't understand!"

"_I _don't understand?" He yelled back angrily. He took out a small black velvet box from his pocket and eyed it carefully before throwing it down at the sand. Her throat became dry and she couldn't speak. _He was going to ask me to marry him. _

"No, Gabriella," he said quietly. "You don't understand."

He took another step into the ocean, finally deciding he would do it. That he would go away for good and that his pain would finally be gone from his life. He looked back at her, whispering, "I love you. I'm sorry that wasn't enough."

She watched as he walked deeper into the ocean, the water already reaching up to his hips, and before she could control herself, she found her body running after him, sobbing as she did so.

"Troy, don't!" she kept yelling and when she finally reached his body, she wrapped her arms around him tightly, vowing inside her head she would never let go. "Please, I beg you. Don't."

Troy turned around and for what felt like the millionth time today, he was sobbing, hugging her back just as tightly as she was hugging him.

"I-I said no to Jay…" she cried into his shoulder. "Because I realized I would never be able to love him back as much as I love you."

And the two of them stood there, holding each other, hoping that the waves wouldn't carry the other one away from them. Troy knew that there was so much more to talk about, but he didn't mind. They still had the rest of their lives to talk, but a moment like this only lasted during a moment like that and he savored every second they stood under the rising moon, standing in the ocean, holding on to each other.


End file.
